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Magruder, B.A. (1956). You and Your Child: By Winifred De Kok, M.R.C.S., L.R.C.P. New York: Philosophical Library, Inc., 1955. 147 pp.. Psychoanal Q., 25:433-434.
(1956). Psychoanalytic Quarterly, 25:433-434
You and Your Child: By Winifred De Kok, M.R.C.S., L.R.C.P. New York: Philosophical Library, Inc., 1955. 147 pp.
Review by: Betty Allen Magruder
This little book covers such a vast and important period in the child's life, from birth to adolescence, and touches so briefly on so many developmental problems that it may confuse rather than clarify the minds of uncertain parents. It discusses, in a common-sense, practical way, such subjects as the proper attitude to the new baby, how to hold your baby, habit training, giving security to your baby, the toddler, the proper toys, teaching obedience, sex education, and how to enjoy your child. Dr. De Kok obviously has a good understanding of the child and its needs. She attempts throughout the book to remind the mother that her role is to be tolerant, understanding, and interested in her child's development, and to help the child to develop into an independent, useful, and resourceful person. 'In guiding the child in these essential matters the parents will have used tact and gentleness, but will have been firm as rocks', is characteristic of the advice she gives.
Such important problems as temper tantrums, fears, phobias, and disturbances of eating are treated very lightly. The 'golden rule' for the child who will not eat is: 'Never let your child think you care a tuppence whether it eats or not'. With regard to temper tantrums, the author states: 'They are very often merely a safety valve and in no way denote that our child is bad tempered or needing punishment… Frustration is a frequent cause. Avoid this by giving toys appropriate to the age of the child', and other simple measures.
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