Customer Service | Help | FAQ | PEP-Easy | Report a Data Error | About
:
Login
Tip: To search for text within the article you are viewing…

PEP-Web Tip of the Day

You can use the search tool of your web browser to perform an additional search within the current article (the one you are viewing). Simply press Ctrl + F on a Windows computer, or Command + F if you are using an Apple computer.

For the complete list of tips, see PEP-Web Tips on the PEP-Web support page.

Schimel, J.L. (1987). On Failed Intimacy. J. Amer. Acad. Psychoanal., 15(4):553-557.

(1987). Journal of American Academy of Psychoanalysis, 15(4):553-557

On Failed Intimacy

John L. Schimel, M.D.

(Editor's Note: With this issue, The Journal of The American Academy of Psychoanalysis is initiating a new section to include short articles, clinical experiences, and different points of view in handling certain analytic situations. Readers are welcome to submit manuscripts.)

The subject of intimacy is an important one in psychiatry and psychoanalysis. Most of our patients, after all, appear in our offices because of difficulties with ongoing relationships or because of an inability to establish an ongoing relationship.

In the early days of my practice, practically all of my patients were young, unmarried, and female. I began to wonder if all my training as a psychiatrist and psychoanalyst had somehow led me to acquire a profession which my forebears had referred to as that of a schadchen, or professional matchmaker. These young women convinced me that young men were an unsatisfactory, unsavory lot, a disappointment, and a waste of their time. Subsequently, I had a series of young unmarried male patients who, in turn, convinced me that the young women of the time were frustrating, ungiving, exploitative, and a waste of their time and efforts. Since I was persuaded and convinced by both my young female and young male patients, I was perplexed, to say the least.

I was reminded of an old rabbinical story:

A rabbi saw, in turn, a quarreling husband and then his wife. To the complaints of each he murmured, “You're right; you're right.” The rabbi's wife had been eavesdropping.

[This is a summary or excerpt from the full text of the book or article. The full text of the document is available to subscribers.]

Copyright © 2019, Psychoanalytic Electronic Publishing, ISSN 2472-6982 Customer Service | Help | FAQ | Download PEP Bibliography | Report a Data Error | About

WARNING! This text is printed for personal use. It is copyright to the journal in which it originally appeared. It is illegal to redistribute it in any form.