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Frommer, M.S. (2019). Grieve with Me: Discussion of “Who Has the Right to Mourn?: Relational Deference and the Ranking of Grief”. Psychoanal. Dial., 29(4):493-500.

(2019). Psychoanalytic Dialogues, 29(4):493-500

Grieve with Me: Discussion of “Who Has the Right to Mourn?: Relational Deference and the Ranking of Grief”

Martin Stephen Frommer, Ph.D.

We tend to conceive of mourning primarily in intrapsychic terms. In this commentary I highlight how Harvey Peskin’s paper (this issue) helps us to appreciate that grief is not only the product of the individual mind but is also constituted relationally. Both what we experience in our grieving and how we express it is shaped by and through those around us whose grief we bear witness to, as we ourselves grieve and are witnessed by them.

I elaborate further on Peskin’s view of the role of witnessing during grieving and mine another profound implication in his discourse by pointing to the bidirectional influence between mourning and relationality. Not only is mourning fostered through relational engagement, but our grieving together can provide the mortar for the building and sustaining of community.

[This is a summary excerpt from the full text of the journal article. The full text of the document is available to journal subscribers on the publisher's website here.]

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